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I want to create a stored proc for MySQL. Seems like a really straightforward thing except that the MySQL provider for Heroku has binary logging and [insert long description available elsewhere here] so you cannot create a stored proc.

It just throws:

SQL Error (1227): Access denied; you need (at least one of) the SUPER privilege(s) for this operation

Is there a way to overcome this and create a stored procedure (without spending the minimum $108 per month for a fun one-off personal application to have some dedicated database server for 4 tables and probably 100 records ever) or am I in the wrong place?

The place being Salesforce SE apparently. Which seems a crazy place for the official "open a ticket" page to throw someone.

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    I don't know enough about Heroku's setup to add an answer, regrettably, but you're not in the wrong place. Heroku is a salesforce.com product, and we certainly welcome Heroku questions here. You might also want to contact support, as they can probably give you better assistance, but maybe someone here will have an answer. If you get information from support, feel free to add your own answer, too. – sfdcfox Apr 12 '19 at 0:56

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